The Greatest Height
by your allegria
Summary: Tweek can't help that he wants to be friends with Craig. Kenny can't help that he likes Tweek. Craig can't help that he has a problem. [slash, abuse, tweekcraig, tweekkenny]
1. look

A/N: I'm rewriting this story, and you shall never see the original because it is horrible. I actually started this story one very dull day, and it happened to actually go somewhere, which is quite odd because I start many stories, they never go anywhere and I end up feeling very sorry for myself as a writer. However, I suppose this story was a different case, and on some level I felt attachment to it, which made me consider actually rereading it, and maybe editing, and then there were too many corrections to be made, so thus, this little gem popped out.

And yes, in case you were wondering, I _don't_ plan out my stories ahead of time, or proofread them, or edit them, or even look them over before posting it on sites. It's actually a really terrible habit of mine, but I'm just used to bullshitting essays, and once you're good at that, you never go back to making a draft, and then making a final. It's such a bad habit, and I hate it, but you know, these are just stories so I suppose it's alright, isn't it? I wish I were a more responsible person though, that would have been fantastic. (and probably would have given me a better start in life, probably.)

WARNINGS: The usual, you know, slash, sexual situations, abuse, colorful language, hatred of Ashlee Simpson (a reoccurring theme in all of my stories, you'll notice)

DISCLAIMER: Although I absolutely love the show and everything about it, I don't have any claim over it.

COUPLES IN THIS STORY: Probably the main ones will be Tweek/Craig, and Tweek/Kenny, but also will have Stan/Clyde. (Many other couples in the story, as I find the idea of Tweek being with more than two people in a story QUITE amusing)

THE GREATEST HEIGHT

Craig once told me that he liked dressing up for Halloween, but I never questioned exactly why he liked to do it. Craig liked being invisible. Craig liked being someone else, even if it was just for one night.

I hated being invisible. I wasn't the sort of invisible where you couldn't see my body, but the sort of invisible where everyone knew I was there, but just didn't want to acknowledge it. They parted ways for me in the hallways like I was some sort of ghostly king, and I hated it. I knew I was always weird, and I always knew that I would be different from everyone because of it, but I never thought I would be completely isolated.

So it was pretty ironic when Craig, someone who wanted to be invisible, noticed invisible little me for the first time.

We didn't start off with a positive relationship. Craig wasn't the biggest bully in school, but he was still a pretty impressive bully when he wanted to be, and for a while he hated me. I'm not sure why, but he really hated me. He gave me these _looks_ during the first year of high school, and that made me really believe I was just the lowest scum on the face of the planet. Had I been anyone else in the school, I would probably have been more bothered by the whole situation, but as sad as it was, I was so used to the dirty stares. It was just the way my life was. Well, anyway, Craig was there to pick on me like there was no tomorrow, and I just let him.

In the sickest way, I liked it. I liked the attention, because before no one knew who I was, and suddenly Craig hated me, and I was the sorriest guy around. it went from the dirty glares, to the hateful names, then to hitting. I let him, and then one day he came around and dragged me into the locker room and beat me senseless. I didn't notice he was crying until he hugged me and asked me why I let him do it.

Of course I said that I didn't know why. Of course I didn't tell him that I actually almost treasured the way he picked on me because I didn't have anyone else to pay attention to me, and I didn't want to turn into the invisible man everyone felt sorry for only when he died or something like that. I just shrugged, and for once in my life I didn't feel nervous about what was happening.

"If you tell anyone about this, I'll kill you. You got it?", he muttered through his tears, and I nodded even though no one would miss me if I were dead.

For the next few days after that, he ignored me, and I felt mildly annoyed. He didn't pick on me anymore, he picked on Pip instead, and the British boy didn't even _appreciate_ it. I knocked into him in the hallway out of spite, and told him to stay away from Craig. He looked a bit lost, but I couldn't tell whether it was because _I_ was the one telling him to stay away from Craig, or because I made it seem like he _liked_ to be shoved around by bullies all the time, and that he looked for Craig or something. He still nodded, and nervously laughed something like "right-o" and disappeared.

That was how I became the first boy to ever claim a monopoly on a bully.

Token was drunk. He was a funny drunk. He didn't make any jokes or anything, but just watching him was funny enough. Token was the richest out of anyone in school, and it showed. Everything from his head to his toes was brand name. He wore Prada shoes, and not only to fancy parties, but everywhere. His shirt came directly from the Armani Exchange, and he wore Seven for All Mankind jeans, and carried a custom wallet from Louis Vuitton. I knew all of this because I secretly looked through his clothes one day while he was sleeping. It was interesting. Anyway, that wasn't the point. Token was a funny drunk because even though he dressed like a socialite from Beverly Hills, he acted like the rest of us.

Alcoholic redneck. He acted like the worst trash.

Apparently no one else saw the irony like I did, and they all thought I was crazy whenever I laughed at a drunk Token. It didn't exactly matter that I was a little tipsy.

Clyde was a funny drunk, too, but only because he always tried to kiss everyone he looked at when he was drunk. He once got beat up for trying to kiss Wendy's boyfriend. The boyfriend was too drunk to care, but Wendy wasn't and did a number on his ass before Craig got around to stopping her.

Craig was a moody drunk, and he smacked me around a couple of times, but I didn't really mind when he was drunk. It's not like he could _help_ being drunk. It was better than him crying and wanting to die again.

I guess I'm just a happy drunk, drinking helps me calm down, and when I look at my hands I don't seem them twitching like they normally do. I once held Craig's hand when I was drunk, and I was proud of the fact that I didn't have to squeeze too hard to stop the twitches, but they stopped all by themselves. I thought everything was funny, too, even though in the back of my mind I knew they weren't. I could laugh for hours when I was drunk. Craig slapped me once because he thought I was just loosing it, but then he realized that I was laughing because I thought life was funny and he gave me a funny look before smiling.

A couple of times, Kenny would come over and drink with us, but he never said much. He would drink and drink and drink some more until he's the only one left drinking. It would get to a point where he would say something and no one would understand even if he _wasn't _wearing his hoodie, and would fall asleep almost instantly. Craig loved Kenny because he said Kenny was just the funniest guy around. He constantly made me nervous that he would one day need an ambulance from all the drinking, but he never did.

The first time I met them, I was walking home from school. I spotted a familiar orange parka, and then I was shoved into the nearby bushes, and I fell hard onto the dirt before someone grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me up to my feet.

"Where's your little boyfriend?" someone growled. I opened my eyes to look at Mark.

Now in the beginning when I said Craig wasn't the biggest bully, it was because this boy was. Mark was just plain spiteful. I thought Eric Cartman had a total sociopath thing going on, but Mark probably had anti-social personality disorder, and he probably _liked_ it like the sadistic bastard he was. I instinctively flinched. Meetings with Mark never ended well for me.

"Stop it, you're talking to Tweek. He won't get it, dude." Kenny said from somewhere to my left. Although I knew he had said something that I should have been offended at, I was grateful that Mark let me go and shoved me in the other blonde's direction. "Look, Tweek, where's Craig? We really need to talk to him."

"I-I don't know!" I stammered back at them.

"You told me he would know!" Mark hissed at Kenny. The blonde just shrugged.

"I thought he would." Kenny turned his blue eyes back to me, and for a moment I felt like I was looking at someone far older than they really were. "Let's just go."

I thought they were going to leave me alone, but before I could feel relieved, Mark shook his head. "Nah, let's have some fun with this one."

Kenny just stared for a moment, and I thought he was just going to let Mark do whatever he wanted, and then he did a double take. "What? With Tweek? Not cool, dude. Craig will fuck you over, send you to hell, bring you back to life, and do it again!"

"No, it's cool. Craig won't care. I mean look at him, how long did it take for him to pound his-"

"Don't finish that sentence!" Kenny blanched, and threw him the finger. "Dirty asshole."

"Damn, calm down, Kenny." Mark scoffed at him. "I'll let the poor bastard go if you have such a boner for him. Looks like it's your lucky day, but don't let me catch you by yourself, otherwise that pretty little ass is mine." He shoved me to the floor hard, and I barely caught myself before I broke my nose or something.

Mark turned and walked away, and Kenny gave me a partially guilty look before following him. I felt a leap in my gut at the thought of Craig meeting up with Mark, and knew I had to find him. I tried to get up, but ended up collapsing back down and sitting with my knees pulled to my chest. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it would either explode or just stop altogether, and my head felt dizzy. "Just a few minutes…" I told myself. "Just a few minutes…"

A/N: Wow, what was THAT? What's gonna happen to POOR LITTLE TWEEK? AND JUST WHAT DID CRAIG DO? If this weren't my own fanfic, I would probably be wondering these questions and MORE!

Just some notes I wanted to add about this chapter in case you're left confused and bewildered… And just to clarify in general…

Craig's one of those invisible bullies, you know, they pick on people, but the teachers JUST DON'T KNOW! And he's not like known for being a bully, unless he wants to be known, and he just picks on kids no one really cares about.

Tweek and Craig are not BEST FRIENDS, or anything like that. I'm not sure if they're even friends at this point, well, obviously they are, but they haven't gotten to the point of admitting it to each other.

Yes, I know Tweek isn't as twitchy as he was in any other Tweek starring fanfics you've read recently, or even on the show, but he ONLY has ADD according to the best of my knowledge, and so I'm just going to work on that. He isn't going to be doing hardcore drugs, or twitching like a broken vibrator in this story, even though he will have to control himself sometimes, since he's known for yelling and the like. I'm assuming that by this time he has quit the coffee, and even if he didn't, his body would be used to the caffeine, and wouldn't affect him as much. I know he's paranoid, but I don't believe he has schizophrenia either, because he doesn't hallucinate, and schizophrenics usually do. I just realistically don't think Tweek would be a cesspool of every mental disorder and all the drugs in the world… I'm not trying to turn anyone else's view of Tweek away or anything like that, so please don't get mad at me! It's just the way I see it, and you could try to argue with it if you're JUST that type of person, but I really don't care:D

And as ALWAYS, Please, PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE **REVIEW!** This is very important, as my soul lives off of the petty little reviews that you send my way. I am like a review vampire.


	2. what

A/N: It's the second chapter… I feel so bad to leave you guys hanging, but I had just so much crap pile up in my life at the last possible second, so please don't hate me! Also, this chapter might make some people hate me because well… it's not really what you're expecting, unless you're expecting exactly what I'm about to give you, in which case, you ARE expecting the right thing. If not, then I am really, really sorry. I don't know what to say without giving anything away… I'll explain at the end of the chapter!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own it, I've TRIED, but it's just not happening!

WARNINGS: The obvious ones, they're GAY get over it

CHAPTER TWO

I woke up halfway through the night and wondered if my parents were worried. They were worried about me half the time, and half the time they weren't. I didn't know whether I should be offended or pleasantly surprised they weren't strict like some of the other parents I knew.

It scared me half to death when I realized someone was next to me. Before I could scream, a hand that smelled of smoke was clamped over my mouth, and Kenny shushed at me. Taking his hand away, he wiped it on his pants, and drew a drag from his cigarette.

"I just wanted to make sure you would be okay."

"Y-You could have woken me up!" I half shouted at him, even though he just shrugged up at me. "God, I thought you were someone else!"

He stared up at me, his hood casting shadows over his face. "Who else would be here?"

"…I don't know! Maybe some sort of maniac!" I glared up at him the best I could with my heart beating out of my chest, and him smirking at me.

"Well, you got him."

Suddenly, I realized why I was in the dark, hidden behind some bushes. "…Craig… Is Craig alright? What was that all about?"

"Craig, yeah, he's okay. You don't have to worry about it, dude." He flicked the ashes from the tip of his cigarette, and the ashes fell on his jeans. Kenny didn't care.

"Oh…" I said, I didn't want to push it if he wasn't going to tell me. I hate it when people ask me what's wrong when I don't feel like talking. "But you know, thanks for earlier…" I trailed off, feeling a bit silly and awkward. I flushed at Kenny's obvious indifference.

He tapped his cigarette again and the powdery ashes fell to the floor in soft little wisps of gray. I shivered. I hated the cold and I wanted it to die. My arms felt like they were icicles and I could have sworn that my bones were turning into dust as we spoke. I tried to ignore it.

"You cold, Tweek?" Kenny asked me. I shivered and nodded, teeth chattering. He looked like he was going to laugh at me for a second (and wouldn't be the first one to do it) but then pulled off his hoodie and handed it to me. "Don't die now."

I gave him a "are you sure?" sort of look, and he nodded. I pulled it over and it smelled nice. I don't know what I was expecting, but it smelled like soap, and something a bit smoky, probably from all those cigarettes. I smiled at him in thanks, and he smiled back awkwardly like he wasn't used to it, and rubbed his bare arms. I felt almost bad because I had taken his sweater. He was only wearing a thin white t-shirt.

"Look, we can't sit out here all night. Do you want me to take you home or something?"

I blinked at him. "My parents are asleep."

"…Well, what do you usually do then?"

"Go to Craig's." I said. It was true. My parents didn't like being woken up in the middle of the night because they were partially insomniacs due to the caffeine. Craig always took me in. I wondered how weird it would be to go to his house now.

"You could come to my place."

I looked over at him in surprise. "Your place?"

The blonde boy nodded, looking a bit apprehensive. I didn't know why.

I flexed my hands a few times, feeling a bit strange. Normally, I would not go over to a strange boy's house. Kenny wasn't a stranger, but he definitely fell under the whole "strange boy" category because he was just that. Strange. Weird. He sometimes showed up to class really late and limping a bit and the teacher wouldn't say anything because that was normal for Kenny. If it was anyone else, she might say something along the lines of "Why are you late? Are you alright?" but she, like every other teacher before her, gave up on Kenny McCormick after the tenth trip to the Dean's office in the first week, and the constant tardies. So, normally, I wouldn't go to someone's house that had that kind of reputation, but I thought I was already late to go home, so I would just go over to Kenny's. "Okay, that sounds good."

He smiled at me before helping me up. My mind wandered to Craig once more before we crossed the train tracks.

Kenny's house was big. It was one of those houses that looked small from the outside, but when you went inside, it was big. It wasn't well furnished, and more things were broken than would be considered normal, but I didn't really care. I wasn't there to appraise his furniture.

He gave me a slightly embarrassed look as he led me into his bedroom. "Sorry if it's not what you were expecting."

I sat on his bed, and looked around in wonderment. I had never seen so many pictures of half-naked women. Well, I had never really seen any. I saw a sudden flash of movement and saw a little rat nibbling on something in the corner. I squealed. "I love rats!" I said, running over and reaching out for it.

It ran away.

I looked over at Kenny and grinned, feeling a slight spasm run through me. "I didn't know you had pet rats, Kenny."

"I don't." He said, but he was smiling. "You know, I didn't really get it at first, but I get why Craig likes you so much, dude, you're like so…" He waves his hands in the air, trying to explain it to me. "You know, so!"

In the back of my mind, I was wondering something along the lines of "Craig likes me? How much?" but in the foremost of my mind, I smiled at Kenny like I was seeing him for the first time. I noticed how he looked so happy under the flickering lights, and that I never saw him look like he had feelings before. I just thought he was just a quiet, weird boy, but here he was, looking for all the world like a normal boy. His blonde hair was almost getting to the point where it would brush his shoulders if he didn't cut it soon, and his eyes sparkled even in the dull light. He reminded me of glitter.

"Do you want something to drink? I've got beer, and um, water!" He asked me, brightly. I realized he was totally different from when he was just hanging out in public.

I nodded. "Could I get water?"

He left to go get some, and I got bored. I decided to snoop around his bedroom since he didn't have a television set or anything. I found some the normal bedroom items, like clothes and shoes. I found some pens and pencils crammed in his desk drawer along with a copy of a nameless book that I didn't find too appealing. I also found his journal, which I really wanted to read, but seeing as how he could walk in at any moment, catch me, and throw me out, I didn't. Then I found a familiar necklace. It was a gold cross that hung from a heavy chain and I pondered for a moment of where I had seen it, or if I had really even seen the same necklace before putting it back. It was then that I heard muffled shouting and noises that I would recognize anywhere. Someone was fighting outside.

I wasn't sure what to do, so I began to get nervous. It made sense for me to go and look to see who was fighting, but it also made sense that I just stay put because it was someone else's house. I was pacing back and forth, and just about ready to go out when the door opened and Kenny came back in. He held the glass of water out for me to take, and I drank from it even though I wasn't as thirsty now.

"Sorry it took me so long." He mumbled, and I muttered an okay. He wouldn't look me in the eye, and I suddenly felt nervous. "You wanna sleep?"

I wanted to ask him what happened out there, and why he was looking so roughed up, and if I could help him. I wanted to hug him and tell him not to worry because getting beat up was a part of life. There was a lot of other things I wanted to do other than go to sleep, but I just nodded at him. Things can't always be able me getting what I wanted.

We both decided to share the bed since it was big enough. He crawled in, and I awkwardly crawled in after him, my legs feeling cold in my boxers. I was still wearing his hoodie, and I hoped he didn't mind that I slept in it. He didn't say anything, so I just pulled the blankets over myself and just laid there. He clapped the lights off, and I closed my eyes.

While I was making the trip from a conscious being to semi-conscious sleeping being, I heard a sniffle to my side. I hesitated, but I decided to just finally hug the blonde boy. My hand twitched as it went around his side, and I rested my head against his back. Kenny didn't seem like he minded, and I actually felt happy as I fell asleep.

The morning felt like it came too soon, and I didn't feel like moving out of my safe little cocoon. I actually liked sleeping. It would usually take me forever to fall asleep, because I didn't like the process of going to sleep, but once I fell asleep I never wanted to wake up. The process of waking up was actually painful for me. (And people asked why I was an insomniac, wouldn't you become one if sleeping lead to waking up which lead to pain?)

I saw Kenny's blonde head out of the corner of my eye and saw him facing the wall. I wondered what he looked like while he slept, so I carefully turned him over so that he lay on his back. I won't be cliché and say that he looked like an "angel" or something, but he did look very nice just laying there. I frowned when I saw a slight discoloring around his eye, obviously someone had hit him there or he was recovering from another black eye from before. He groaned and opened his eyes, blinking at me a couple of times before sitting up and shaking his head.

"Good morning, did you have a nice night?", I asked him politely. My mother always asked me this in the morning, and I in turn inherited the habit.

"Yeah, Tweek, real nice night with you squeezing the hell outta me.", he grinned back, and climbed out of bed. "Do you need clothes for school?"

It took me a moment to realize that today was a school day, and not a Saturday, or a Sunday like my brain seemed to register it as. "Oh Jesus, I have to call my mom!" I half shouted at him before stumbling out of bed and taking the sheets with me. "Damnit, I always get tangled", I complained and Kenny just slipped on another sweater before laughing at me.

"Don't destroy my bed, Tweek, it's the only one I have." He teased, and I felt a hot flush making its way to my face. Not now, not now!

"S-sorry, but could I use your phone? Please?" I gave him my best forlorn look, but he shook his head.

"Sorry, dude, we don't have one here. Just went out a few days ago", he said, tugging on some jeans. "Just come with me to the bus stop, and I'll get something for you though."

I nodded and finished getting dressed for school.

&&&&&&&

Stan nodded a hello, Kyle said hello, and Eric Cartman gave a loud, "What's going on, fags?"

Kenny just shrugged, and I didn't say anything as I nervously met them at the bus stop. The cold weather outside made me shiver, and I hugged myself. "Dude, Tweek needs your phone."

Stan looked over at me in what seemed to be surprise. "Is that Tweek?"

Kyle and Cartman seemed to notice me for the first time, too, and I felt uncomfortable under the stares. Kenny nodded. "Phone. He needs to call his mom."

"Oh damn, did the little homos spend their first night together? How fucking cute, you guys, he's wearing Kenny's little orange jacket! In homo-language, that means they're married. Isn't that fucking adorable as fuck?" Cartman grinned lewdly.

Kenny glared. "It's not like that you fat fuck. Stan, phone. Please?"

Stan mumbled something as he pulled out a small flip hone from his back pocket. "Just don't break it." Kenny took it and tossed it over to me. I thankfully caught it because Stan looked like he would have had an aneurysm if I hadn't. "God damnit, Kenny, I told you not to break it."

"I didn't." Kenny said innocently. Kyle just laughed.

"Stan's just angry because we went out drinking with Craig's gang last night, and Clyde kissed him!" Kyle giggled madly. "Damn, it was the funniest thing I've ever seen!" Stan just dejectedly stuck his middle finger up at the redhead, but Kyle didn't' care. "Didn't you want to cherish your memories, Stan?"

"Whatever, fuck you, I'm going to go stand over there where there AREN'T any stupid douche bags!"

Stan stomped over to the other side of the sign post, and Kyle grinned at Kenny. "He's taking it well."

My mom picked up the phone on the fourth try and told me that she had to go because another shipment of grounds was due to Harbucks this morning. "But thank you for checking in, Tweek, you're turning into such a responsible young man! Be sure to come home later on today though, I miss my blonde little twitch!" she said before she hung up.

I handed the phone back to Stan, and he shoved it angrily into his pocket.

Craig was mad when he saw me. I was almost sure he was going to hit me, but he snarled, "I'm not going to hit you, Tweek." And then I knew better. For a second, I thought he was going to kiss me, too, but that went away when he shoved me into the boy's bathroom and locked the door. I felt myself twitch and felt uncomfortable again because he was staring me down. "Where were you yesterday?"

Yesterday? "At Kenny's. Well, I was asleep in some bushes, but then I went to Kenny's." It sounded much more normal in my head. Craig raised his eyebrow at me which usually meant he was going to loose his cool and jump around.

"Kenny's. You were at Kenny's." He said in disbelief. "What have I told you about going to Kenny's?"

"Nothing! You never told me anything about going to Kenny's. Are you mad?"

"You were supposed to meet us at the arcade, remember?" I didn't remember, but I didn't want him to yell at me, so I nodded. He yelled anyway. "You remembered that you were supposed to meet us at the arcade, but you didn't. You fell asleep in some bushes, and then you went to Kenny's?"

"What's wrong, Craig? I just went over to his house. It's not a big deal.", I insisted, and he pushed me against the wall. The cold tiles sent shivers up my spine, and I felt like crying.

"Not a big deal?", he ground out. "Not a big deal! Tweek, do you even know what Kenny is? He's a fucking _whore_, and not only is he damn whore, but he's a damn _fag_ and do you know what little fag whores do, Tweek? They take you to their house, and they fuck you, and then they leave you for _dead,_ Tweek. That's what little fag whores like Kenny do. If you stay around him, he's going to kill you dead, and he won't even feel sorry for it."

I shook my head at him. "Kenny's my friend, Craig. He's my _friend_. He wouldn't do that to me!" Craig slapped me hard, and I cried out before I could stop myself.

"Your friend? You think he's your fucking friend? God, you're such a stupid fuck. You're just gonna go with some stupid fucking blonde who can't even take care of himself? You can't change him, Tweek. He's never gonna be your friend, because all he is a stupid ass WHORE!" he shouted at me, and I felt myself frantically blink away my tears.

"Craig, please, he's my friend. Don't make me stop seeing him." I pleaded. I liked Kenny, but if Craig said I couldn't see him, I wasn't sure if I could. Craig was all I had sometimes, and I think both us knew it. It was sad, but Craig was always there for me. Kenny, he was only there for one night. "He's a really nice guy, he even gave me his sweater, see?"

Craig gave me a disgusted look and shook his head. "Tweek, if you want to fucking see him, I'm not going to stop you, but if I ever catch you hanging out with him, I'll make sure both of you regret it. You understand, don't you?"

The funny thing was, I did understand. Craig was the closest thing I had to a friend, and he paid attention to me even when no one else would. I know I couldn't give that up for one night of pity-friendship from Kenny. If Craig took back whatever we had now, I wouldn't have anything.

My heart hurt.

I avoided Kenny three times today. Once during class when he asked for a piece of paper, once in the lunchroom when he smiled at me, and once in the hallway where he asked me if I was okay and I spun and ran in the other direction until I was sure I couldn't see him. Craig gave me a look of approval when I told him, and asked me if I wanted a ride home. I nodded a yes, glad we were on good terms again.

I went to the locker room to meet him after my last class, because he usually keeps his books in the PE locker room instead of in the other lockers outside. Probably because it was safer in there, and no one ever bothered to steal anything from the PE locker rooms. I walked in and heard some noises in the back, and I realized it was Clyde and Craig arguing. I felt bad sneaking up, but I wanted to know what they were saying, so I snuck closer.

"He's not yours, Craig. Just let him do what _he_ wants."

"I'm not saying he's _mine_, Clyde, you stupid fucker. I just want… I don't know, dude, I just… Look, you just don't fucking get it, okay?"

"What you're doing is fucking sick, dude. Even Token thinks so. What you're doing to him is just sick. You can't just control him like that all the time, look at him! He's a fucking mess for crying out loud, and you're making it worse. You're always treating him like shit, just let him go for once! He doesn't need your fucking permission to make a damn friend."

I didn't hear anything else from Craig's side, except a few quiet mumbles, and I heard a locker door clang shut. "Look, I'm leaving. Just think about it, will you? I'm worried. This just isn't normal."

I hid behind a row of lockers as I saw Clyde walk out, and then I made as if I had just come in, and waved hello to Craig. He sat on the wooden bench, his head hung low, and he looked up as he heard my footsteps. I paused awkwardly with my hand in the air, the bottom of my stomach feeling like I was falling.

"What are we?" He asked me, his voice sullen and quiet.

"What?"

"What are we? Are we friends, or enemies?"

"We're friends, Craig." I frowned and felt weird saying those words to him. I felt like I had just signed some nonverbal contract, and Craig nodded at me, his face neutral.

I quietly followed him home.

&&&&&&

A/N: e.e;; what WAS that.. A little weird, right? Okay, I admit I always feel that way about my stories at the end, because I don't plan things out. I just have this general overview of what something's supposed to be, and then I just wing it! BAD erica, BAD… I just wanted to say, sorry if I disappointed anyone… I know I can't please everyone, but I so wanted to try… I hope it's good enough for you! TT (Yes, I'm having self-confidence problems lately. I'm usually really conceited) I AM NOT WORTHY! I've been feeling like I've just been spewing out total CRAP lately.

Anyway, I just wanted to answer a couple of the reviews here, because they were REALLY lovely, and made me cry joyous tears while drinking my hot coffee at five in the morning. I'm a little over-dramatic, yeah…

I wanted to thank **kennyluver4**, **spamlord**, and **blackneontears** for just REVIEWING, because believe it or not, it inspires me greatly… :D

To **Vcorrigan**… It's supposed to be the gang in high school. They did know each other during the elementary years, but it's just mostly about them in high school. I just figured people would ignore Tweek because they stopped paying attention to him in the show, but I just read way too much into things. You could have them be whatever age you want, but the story would make more sense if you read it with the high school setting in mind. Mark is not Mark Cotswalds… I forgot all about him. He's just a random bully, and my friend gave me the random name. I'm glad you liked it though, I read through it, and it WAS a bit confusing because my word processor doesn't know how to keep things the way I LEFT them, and changes things around quite drastically. ;;

**Qindarka**, you are FABULOUS. I read your review in one of my university lectures, and I received some dirty looks from people because I was squeeing like mad. That was just about the BEST thing anyone could have ever written to me, and it just made me ridiculously happy for the rest of the day, and my friend thought I was drunk. (One-track mind…) Obviously, I was drunk with _happiness_:D I hope this chapter please you, because if it doesn't, I'm seriously going to cut myself and cry. (Okay, I really won't do that because I love my wrists too much, but I might consider crying.)


	3. i

**A/N**: this has nothing to do with anything, but I made an LJ! I'm so proud. :D Also, my formatting is all fucked up… you know, like I have a new computer, and my aunt just bought me a laptop, so you would think at least ONE of them wouldn't fuck up my stories, but they **BOTH** DO! I CANNOT GET OVER IT!

**CHAPTER THREE**

Craig drove me to school in the morning, which was rare even though his house wasn't too far from mine. I remember when my parents were happy that he got his first car because they thought "that nice boy Craig" would drive me to school every day in the mornings. I almost laughed at that, because back then asking Craig for a ride would be like asking the devil for a kitten. I didn't want to disappoint them so I walked to school every day after that, pretending that I got a ride from him. Now, I really do get rides from him, but they're not as often as I'd like them to be.

"When are you going to get your D.L.?" He asked me as I awkwardly climbed into his car, sighing in happiness as the heat washed over me.

"I don't know." I said, even though in my mind I was screaming that if I could help it, I would never get a stupid driver's license so help me GOD. I was just a little scared of getting in a crash and dying, or getting lost somewhere and dying, or slipping off the road and dying, or something. "Soon, I guess."

Craig laughed, shaking his head. "You're never gonna get it. Just admit you're retarded." He looked behind him as he pulled out of the driveway.

I half-glared at him, but couldn't get myself to fully glare at him. I was tired. I'm not a deep sleeper. I leaned my head against the window, and the cool, smooth glass against my head felt nice. "Craig, you know, the other day… Mark was looking for you. What did you do?"

He sniffled, and we stopped at a red light. "Tweek, you know, I tell you a lot of shit, but that's not gonna be one of them."

"What did you do, Craig? Why was he looking for you?"

"God, Tweek! It's none of your damn business!" He shouted at me. Craig turned right abruptly, and I was glad he needed to concentrate on driving, because otherwise he might have already punched me. I shut my mouth, and didn't say anything else for the rest of the ride.

&&&&&&&

Kenny knew I was avoiding him. Or, actually, he must have known since he actually started avoiding me, too. A part of me really wanted to go talk to him, tell him that I didn't hate him, that I didn't mean to avoid him, but I didn't want to loose my friendship with Craig. I spent all day worrying about it, biting my nails down to bloody stumps, and still I couldn't stop obsessing.

I wondered what Kenny really thought about me, and if he wanted to be friends like I wanted, if he was even that desperate. I felt stupid, and lonely. I felt like I wanted to cry, but I just couldn't find the right reason to. In the back of my mind, I knew Craig didn't have any control over me, and that I could walk over to Kenny and talk to him as if we were friends, but I just couldn't get up the nerve to do it. I didn't know what scared me more - Craig beating the crap out of me, or the fact that Kenny could reject me if I tried.

&&&&&&

I waited for Craig in the parking lot after school, but he never showed up. I waited until the last car was gone before I picked myself up from the hard concrete. It wasn't very cold because the morning snow was half-melted, small puddles covering the ground with small glaciers floating along the top. I made a point to step on every pile of half-melted snow, hoping to make it melt faster. I hated the cold.

I was enjoying myself until someone grabbed my arm and spun me around. "Kenny?"

"Look, hear me out, please." He said, sounding rushed. "I wasn't trying to hit on you or anything like that by sleeping with you that night. I swear to God, Tweek, I wasn't. I know it freaked you out, but at least _talk_ to me."

I blinked. "You think I'm homophobic?"

Kenny thought I was homophobic. This whole time, he thought I was _homophobic._

"Well, aren't you? Isn't that the reason why you're not talking to me?"

I frowned and furiously shook my head. "I hang out with Clyde. He kisses boys when he's drunk, Kenny. If I was homophobic, I wouldn't be around him! I mean, I couldn't!"

"Then why are you avoiding me?"

"I-I don't know, Kenny."

"I see." He nodded, looking away. "If you didn't want to be my friend, you could have just said so."

"Kenny, that's not-"

"Look, whatever, Tweek. I don't care." He pulled his hoodie over his eyes, and walked away, leaving me before I could explain myself.

I didn't run after him, but I wanted to.

&&&&&&

"Token's parents are gonna go out of town this weekend. You know what that means right?" Craig grinned at me. We were at the local Harbucks, only because my dad wanted me to drop by before Craig took me to the arcade. I didn't mind, I still liked the free coffee. I nodded at his question, holding back a sigh. His voice dropped into a whisper. "We're gonna get so fucked. You're coming right?"

"I don't know. I have to ask my parents."

Craig raised an eyebrow at me. "You still do that? When are you going to grow up, Tweek?" He playfully shoved me as he walked out the doorway, the tiny bell jingling.

I sighed. "Same time I learn how to drive."

&&&&&&

Token had a big house. Big would be an understatement. Token had the kind of house you'd only be able to see on television. Not the kind of house you walk into, and run out of because you're too scared to touch anything, but the kind of house where you knew you were welcome. Clyde always joked around that if his house were any bigger, it wouldn't be in South Park, it would _be_ South Park.

Token didn't flaunt any of it though. We all knew he knew he was rich, but sometimes being the only rich kid in town could hurt more than it could do good. He never went out of his way to fit in with the rest of us, but being rich was what made him, well, him. We all had at least one quirk. I was an emotional wreck, Craig hated everyone, and Clyde kissed boys when he was drunk. Secretly, when he was sober.

We all assembled in his living room, mostly because that was where the television was. Craig smiled and handed me a cup full of dark liquid. "Here, we got some clear stuff today. I know that freaks you out. I put coke in it."

I took the cup and awkwardly took a sip from it. I always felt so nervous when I drank, like my parents were going to come bursting into the room at any moment. I could just imagine the way my mother would tell me that I had been her only hope, and my father would frown as if I had greatly disappointed him. It made my stomach swim. I tried to look as normal as possible, instead of like a kid. I always felt so immature compared to everyone else. Especially when we did stuff like this.

"Like it?"

I looked up at Craig, who was grinning down at me. "I guess. It tastes like gasoline." He enthusiastically nodded his head.

"I know, isn't it great?"

I gave him a weak smile, and took another sip which immediately made me feel like throwing up. Token sat on the couch, flipping through various channels with Clyde commenting on why we shouldn't watch each one.

"Hey, when are Stan and Kyle getting here?"

I looked up in surprise at the question when several things happened. The doorbell rang, Craig shouted something obscene about how "the fucking blonde better not have come", Token jumped up to open the door, Clyde accidentally upset a cup of beer on the sofa, and I opened my mouth to say something, _anything_, but couldn't get anything out except a "what?" which was drowned out by the rest of the commotion. Stan and Kyle stumbled in, dusting snow off their jackets, and laughing at something that only they knew of.

"Dude, your house is fucking ridiculous." Stan shook his head.

Token laughed, but Craig cut in before he could say anything. "He knows. Where's Kenny?"

Stan and Kyle shared a look before Stan said anything. "He's not coming tonight. He's out with Cartman."

"Cartman? People actually _willingly_ hang out with him!"

Kyle threw his hands up in the air. "You're telling me! I say that _all_ the time! Tell him, Stan!" Stan gave Kyle a good-natured pat on the back, and cooed at him.

"You shouldn't get him excited. His blood pressure will go up, and then kapooey! No more Jew…"

&&&&&&

Everyone was watching the _Jackass: the movie_, except Kyle who sat off in the corner by himself drinking a can of regular soda. I wobbled over to him, trying to keep my sickness to myself, and plopped down on the floor next to him.

"Tweek, are you okay?"

"Not really, no…" I shook my head at him, and then smiled. "I feel like crap. Aren't you going to drink anything?"

"No… Stan usually gets pretty fucked… I'm the designated driver." He smiled, holding up his can of soda. "Besides, knowing my mom, she'll telekinetically sense it, and gouge out my right eye or something."

"Oh. Well, like, Craig drinks. _And _he drives." I said proudly even though I couldn't really do either. "Hey, Kyle? Why isn't Kenny here today?"

"Kenny?" He asked me, giving me a look of surprise. His voice dropped down as he looked around the room. "Why are you asking about Kenny? You… Kenny said you hated him."

I shook my head. "NO, no, no. I don't hate Kenny."

"Then why would he say you did?"

"Because I'm not allowed to hang out with him anymore." I said, and suddenly I felt my cheeks grow hot. "I'm not allowed to see him anymore, Kyle."

"Tweek, Jesus, are you crying? Don't _cry_." He reached down to smooth my hair back from my face, and I felt the lump in my throat grow. I felt so hollow.

"I'm not crying."

"…Of course you're not. You're drunk. But, what do you mean, you _don't_ hate Kenny? You really don't?"

I opened my mouth, but Craig was already there before I could say anything. He shot Kyle an accusatory stare.

"What are you guys talking about? Why is he crying?"

Kyle put up his hands and shook his head. "Nothing, I don't know. He's drunk. Drunk people do that."

Craig didn't say anything, but gave him a suspicious look, and then turned to look at me. "Why are you crying?" I shook my head, feeling the small hiccups in the back of my throat. My head was hurting.

"Look, I'm gonna take him home. Your little boyfriend's upstairs doing God knows what with Clyde."

"He's not my boyfriend." Kyle spat out. "And you're _drunk_, Craig. You can't go anywhere with him. I'll take him home."

"Don't fucking tell me what I can't _DO_, Broflovski. I said I'll take him home." He wrapped his arms around me, and tried to lift me up, but I couldn't get up because I was still bawling for no reason. "Get up, Tweek. Up."

"I can't…"

"Fucking do it."

"I can't, Craig, my head… It _hurts_…"

"Look, I'll take him later, Craig, you're gonna kill him!"

Craig put up an arm to flip Kyle off, and I heard the redhead give an exasperated sigh. "Fine, whatever. Go be a murderer. I mean, I'm only trying to save his life, and maybe yours, but whatever, no one listens to Kyle anyway!"

He managed to get me up on my feet, and we headed outside. It was cold, and my breath clung to the air in cold, white, little clouds. It was dark, and the moon didn't help to light the dark night. Craig opened a car door and shoved me in. "Do you need anything?"

"What?"

"Like meds or something, you need any meds?"

I shook my head. "No… I haven't taken any since fifth grade."

"Right." He got in, and started the car, pulling out the driveway so fast the tires squealed. "Fuck Tweek, what were you guys even talking about, huh?"

"Nothing."

"Yeah, I'll bet it was nothing. Nothing makes you cry now? Don't lie to me, what was it?"

I sighed. "I just asked him why Kenny wasn't there. It's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal?" Craig laughed, loud and harsh. "You just can't fucking get over him, huh? What did he ever do for you, Tweek? What?"

"Nothing, he didn't have to do anything for me! He was just _there_, Craig. He's just my friend. I don't want to talk about this with you, you just make everything worse!"

Craig slammed on the brakes. "Wait, what?" There was a moment of uncomfortable silence. "I make everything _worse_?"

"…I'm sorry, I'm just drunk. I didn't mean it."

"Drunk people don't _lie_, Tweek." He rested his head against the steering wheel and sighed.

I looked over. He looked blurry because I was crying, and faint because it was dark, and the streetlight in back of him gave him a glowing, angelic quality, and I felt myself want to cry harder at the thought of ever hurting him. Of ever hurting my best friend. My _only_ friend. I closed my eyes and tried to picture all the times he ever smiled at me, and made me smile, and tried to send them into this mind. To smash them in there, so all he could ever picture was us being happy, and never sad.

"Get out." He whispered.

My head snapped towards him. He was still in the same position, without any expression on his face. "What? …Craig, I'm sorry. I promise I won't ever talk about him again. "

"Right now, Tweek. Get out."

"My house is like four block away, it's _snowing_. I can't walk in the snow, you know that! Craig, please…"

"Get out before I fucking make you."

"Craig…"

"_Now, _Tweek."

"I'll _die_ out there. I can't _breathe_ in the snow, you _know_ that."

"Fucking deal with it."

I put my hand on the metal handle, but stopped myself from opening the door. "No."

"What? This is _my_ fucking car, Tweek. Get out."

"No. It can't end like this, Craig. It won't end like this. We're friends. If I get out now, we won't be friends, because I'll be dead, and you'll hate me."

"Tweek, I'm not against beating the shit out of you. I think you know that."

"Then do it." I said, leaning into the seat. My heart felt like exploding out of my chest, and my head felt like every single vein was planning an intricate escape plan out of my brain.

Craig sat back for a minute, before reaching out and opening his door. I looked at him in surprise, but he was already on my side, pulling me out. "I said I was gonna do it, Tweek, why don't you ever believe me?" He dumped me without ceremony, and I felt my face collide with the snowy ground.

"I believe you! I _always_ believe you! But… I don't ever want to loose you…" I sniffled.

Craig leaned over, and picked me up by the arm. His nose was right next to mine. "God, Tweek, what are you? Some girl? You fucking crushing on me now? You're lucky I don't fucking hit _girls_."

He dropped me, and kicked snow at me before walking back to his car. I picked myself up from the snow, but didn't bother to stop him as he sped off. I wiped the gritty snow off my face, and dusted myself off before I started walking toward my house.

**A/N:** YES THEY WILL END UP LIKING EACH OTHER. I know, Craig is behaving in an absolutely disgusting manner. If his personality wasn't a figment of my imagination, I would be _appalled_! Anyway, this is the third chapter, so I'm feeling rather proud of myself. A little tired, seeing as how it's 4:17AM, but other than that, it's quite alright. I also have a headache. Tweek has one, too. You see what I did there:D

Also, Tweek's drink… Craig mixed coke with alcohol because Tweek feels strange drinking clear liquids since he's basically lived off of COFFEE his whole life! In case that totally went over your head… I thought it would be sweet if Craig knew that.

**Qindarka: **You make me want to buy you things. Lots of things, preferably things that are expensive and adorned with diamonds. Unfortunately I don't have a job, nor do I have any money, so I'll just have to work extra hard on this story for you. :D And, yeah, about the sex… I've been on since the beginning of time or something, and all slash is just basically like "and he couldn't take his eyes off of his friend's body, so he thought "omg, am I gay?" and then his friend also turns out to be gay" stuff, sooooo, I thought why not have them NOT be gay at the beginning of the story? I feel sort of bad though, because I know that's what most people are looking for… oops! I don't mean to be redundant, but I'm glad I make you happy with my story, although I'm not sure why you would be sad in the first place! I hope you like this one…

**Toasty:** Haha, you made me laugh with the whole "I never review thing" because I totally am guilty of that.. It's the reason why I can't really post "review NOW" at the end of my chapters… So thank you so much for reviewing and bringing a little light at the end of this dark, dark tunnel :D


	4. can

A/N: HIIII! Do you remember me:D NO? D: Ok, I guess that sounds about right since I've neglected you guys for like months and months. It still hurts though! Anyway, I had a good reason of being away for so long. I'm failing school, I was majorly depressed, I found out I had more issues then something that has a lot of issues, AND I think I found my "the one". 8D SOOO, I'M SCARED AS FUCK! I am officially a "fuck-up". I'm a LITTLE proud of myself… X

A BIG THANK YOU TO TOASTY FOR REMINDING ME THAT THIS EXISTED, YOU KNOW, IN THE NOT BACK OF MY MIND, BUT IN THE FRONT!

That sort of doesn't make sense.

WARNINGS/DISCLAIMER: I want to own it, but I cant, and I don't, and you shouldn't sue me. There's a lot of stuff in this chapter, it might be pretty gay.

CHAPTER FOUR

My feet made sloshing noises as I trudged through the grimy snow. I hated Craig, and I hated his car, and I hated the fact that I was sensitive to the stupid cold. I hated how I couldn't breathe and now I kept panicking so it was harder to concentrate on breathing instead of passing out on the cold pavement. Cold, wet, pavement. Friendship was so pointless sometimes, but I wouldn't know since Craig was the whole "friendship" deal for me. He was it. The end.

_Breathe in._

Breathe out.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

I could feel sharp pains in my right lung, or somewhere around it, but I knew it couldn't be my heart because that was different. Wasn't it?

I couldn't walk too close to the street, because then cars would honk their stupid horns at me, and I couldn't walk too far away from the street because that's where all the half-melted snow was, and the bottoms of my jeans were getting soaked through, and I hated feeling the dirty ice water on the back of my legs. I kept going though, past one lamp post, and then another, and then another… I lost count, and the cars stopped passing by for a long time before a red SUV pulled up next to me and honked twice.

I stopped. It stopped. 

I considered the possibilities. Rapist. Murderer. Stalker. Craig. Not Craig. Someone who was lost. Someone who wanted to kidnap me and sell me to some government based laboratory so they could strip me naked and use my body for devious medial research. I pulled my sleeves down nervously, and called out hello. "Hello?"

The window rolled down, and a familiar voice called out to me. "Tweek, get in."

"Um, my mom said that I shouldn't get into cars with strangers, so, um, who are you?", I half-shouted.

An exasperated sigh. "It's Kyle."

"….."

"…Kyle Broflovski."

I nodded and reached out for a handle, but it was locked. I waited until I heard the click of the doors unlocking and climbed inside, feeling slightly uncomfortable that I was sitting in the front seat while Kyle looked on patiently while I fumbled around for the seat belt. "Hi."

"Hey. Where's Craig?"

"He went home. Where's Stan?"

"Knocked out in the back." Kyle nodded his head toward the general direction of the backseats. I looked over. "He fell to the floor when we went down that hill."

"Oh."

Kyle shrugged and put the car into drive and we slowly made our way towards the regular part of South Park, where every house didn't have about five cars, a swimming pool, and a tennis court.

"…So why is Craig at home when you're out in the cold?"

"We had a fight." I cleared my throat. "I won."

Kyle nodded. We pretty much sat in silence for a while, Kyle fumbling with the radio, Stan making soft noises in the back, and me. I tried not to bite my nails, so I ended up nibbling on the skin around instead.

"You know, it's not right what he does to you. He takes advantage of you."

"Only because I let him." I said defensively. "Craig's a good guy, I don't know why everyone doesn't know it."

"He left you to _die_ because you pissed him off!"

"Yeah, _I_ pissed _him_ off! You can't just blame the whole thing on him. He's my best friend, he wouldn't hurt me."

Kyle sighed. "Craig is not your best friend. Craig is your BULLY. Best friends don't ditch you, they're supposed to stick around no matter what."

"Oh, so is that why you went to the party together with Stan, but he ended up ditching you for Clyde? Is that why he drank until he passed out, while you sat there with a can of COKE?"

"Hey, that's different!"

"How? How is that _different_?"

"First of all, Stan and Clyde like each other, and I _don't_ drink!"

"If you say so. My house is right there." I pointed at the dark street, Elspeth Way. "I know that you think that you and Stan are 'super best friends' or whatever, so you think you know what having a best friend is supposed to be like, so you lecture me, but I think you need to stop and fix the fact that Stan treats you like shit first!"

I groped around for the handle, and Kyle pushed the unlock button. I climbed out. "…Thanks for saving my life."

"Don't mention it."

I kicked the snow at my feet as I dragged myself up the dark driveway. It was almost creepy. The lamp post outside of my house was always flickering, ever since I can remember. I don't know why they never bothered to fix it since we always sent letters of complaints and stuff. It was pretty much the most retarded, unreliable-

"Tweek?"

Oh God. I recognized that voice. I turned around and squinted in the darkness. "Craig?"

"I'm on the steps, you doofus." I could hear him smiling. "You're looking the wrong way."

Sure enough, when I turned to look, he was on my front steps. He looked like he had been carved into the wood instead of just sitting around. He wiped at his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket. "Tweek, I'm a little drunk."

I walked over to him, resting my hand on his head, the soft cloth of his hat sliding down a little. I pulled it off.

"I'm sorry I left you. I didn't mean to. I was just so mad. I didn't know. I went back, but I couldn't find you."

"It's okay. I don't mind."

"Sit down?" Craig patted the snow-covered step next to him. "Right here."

I sat down, and leaned sort of into him from the cold outside. Craig wrapped his arm around me and squashed me into him. I wanted to pull away, but it felt so good. I relaxed and leaned my head against his shoulder as he babbled on about being sorry in general. I wondered if he would even remember this in the morning.

He suddenly moved away from me, letting go of my shoulders to instead grab my face and to pull it closer to his. "I'm so sorry, I'm such a fuck up, you know? …I want to be better for you, but I just don't know how. I try sometimes, just to see what it would be like…" Craig moved back, sighing and wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket. "I don't understand why you always follow me around. I wish I could stop it."

"You don't want to hang around me?"

"No! I _do_, Tweek. I like you, and I can't handle it because it scares me. I don't want to hurt you."

"So, why do you have to?"

He looked up at me with his dark eyes and he awkwardly placed his hand on mine, unaware that he was smashing it against the cold wood, and leaned closer to put his lips against mine, and I pressed back just as hard until he brought his hands back up to my face and kissed me sloppily, the alcohol on his breath and his cheeks cold and slippery from crying.

I was just getting used to the idea that I had my best friend's tongue in my mouth before his slow kisses stopped, and he pulled away abruptly, yelling out obscenities. "Oh, _GOD_, oh my fucking God, oh GOD!"

"Craig?"

I stared at his pale face illuminated by the flickering street light, and his wide eyes and I wondered why he seemed so unfamiliar.

"I have to go."

He started walking to his car, and I jumped up to follow him. "Go? Go where?"

"To go _home_."

"But why? I thought you liked me, you should stay."

Craig let out a cold bark of a laugh, before turning to me. "I _hate_ you, Tweek. Why won't you get that? Trying to whore yourself out to me won't get you _anywhere_. BYE." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and slunk his way to the car, and I just stood there, and it wasn't until his car was out of sight that I realized that I had been crying the whole time.

**A/N: **UM, so WHY am I such a cruel, heartless bitch? I don't know. D: I thought it was going smashingly, you know, down the road of happiness, but then I thought "no, no. it needs to be emo"

I hope you liked this chapter, I know it sucked hardcore. I'm sick though, and half delusional. :D


	5. purpa

A/N: okay, so I know I haven't updated in FOREVER, but in the past week I've been through so much trauma. The love of my life is starting to hate me, my parents are starting to hate me (I actually got kicked out of the house), my best friend got into a serious car crash, and my friend's mom lied to me. THEREFORE, I have an excuse for last week… the rest of the time, idk idk ; Thank you to all of the REVIEWERS! You make this work. 3

Chapter Five

Craig ignored me in school the next day. Not even going out of his way to avoid me, but straight out ignoring me, as if I didn't exist. I waved to him in homeroom, and I tried to sit next to him during lunch, but both times I was brushed off without even a glance in my direction. I suddenly felt sick and my chest area hurt like something big was pressing down on it. And the more Craig ignored me, the more I wondered if I had done something to upset him, even though I knew I hadn't. He kissed me, he was the one that had wanted me. Maybe I shouldn't have been such a whore, but I _liked_ him. It's not supposed to be a bad thing to kiss someone you like..

Kenny was the only one who noticed that anything was off with Craig and me, and he sat next to me in the library during study hall, leaning his books to the side so that we wouldn't be caught talking. I didn't have much to say, and my thoughts kept going back to Craig, but I was thankful for the company anyway, nodding in agreement when he asked me to go over to his house again.

The rest of the day passed by in a blur.

Kenny walked me to his house after school, and I smiled at the awkward silences when he would briefly turn to smile at me before looking away again, walking briskly towards the train tracks that separated his world from mine. I didn't mind that he was so quiet all of the time, it wasn't a bad sort of quiet, like the kinds that came up between Craig and me when he was mad and I didn't know how to fix it, it was just quiet. Like when you step into a willow tree, a secretive quiet. You can't really quite understand it unless you've been there before.

He suddenly turned towards me, looking worried. "Hey, you're not hungry are you?"

I shook my head.

"Good, because sometimes I get hungry after school… But not today."

He led me through the dark living room, and into the hallways into his room, which was softly lit by the light outside. His bed was the only mess in his room, and I suddenly flashed back to sleeping in it only days before. It seemed like a long time ago.

Kenny flopped down on his bed, still fully dressed and looked up at me. "So what do you wanna do?"

I shrugged, still thinking about Craig. Everything always led back to him.

Kenny looked around his room lazily, then up at me. "Ugh, sorry my house sucks. Bet you have lots of stuff at Craig's."

I sat down on the floor, crossing my legs and examining my shoelaces, which always seemed to fall apart at the tips. I cracked the plastic off of one. "Not really. He just usually sits on the bed, and we just think."

"Think?"

"Yeah, he likes that."

"Does he ever tell you what he thinks about?" Kenny sat up now, looking interested. "I mean, does he ever mention other people and stuff?"

"Sometimes, yeah…"

"…Like, who?"

"I'm not sure." It was a lie. I did know who Craig talked about. Of _course_ I knew who he talked about. I memorized every word he ever said to me, repeating it in my head like a mantra for hours, even days after. I wanted to tell him: _sometimes he talks about you, and how bad you are… _

Kenny nodded, and leaned back again. "And what do you think about?"

"Nothing, really."

"Do you ever think about him?"

I nodded. "Well, yeah, I have to. I mean, he's my best friend."

"No, I meant do you _think_ about him?"

_Yes. _"No."

He looked over at me, pulling his hood down to show his blue eyes, and I wondered if he could see into my mind with them, pulling out all the pieces Craig left behind, putting them together and seeing what I saw. He smiled at me, and slid near the wall, patting the space besides him. "Let's take a nap, Tweek."

I nodded, suddenly feeling sleepy. I dusted off the pieces of shoelace plastic off my jeans, and pulled off my shoes before crawling into bed. He wrapped his arms around me, and I shut my eyes, imagining a completely different pair. I looked into his eyes and I saw Craig's blue hat. And when he kissed me, I wanted to taste the beer and the salty tears, and I wanted it to be freezing cold with the flickering street lamp, instead of a warm bed with a blonde who couldn't ever have Craig's black hair. My chest felt the painful pressure again, and I had to wonder if that was how it felt for a heart to be broken. Like, the way you feel when you know you can't ever have something back. I loved _Craig_, but Kenny.. He loved me.

A/N: ummmm, I don't know what that was. Let me know what you guys think.


End file.
